Is your pet's rear offensive? Try Rear Gear!

This item is just screaming for its own infomercial:

"Are you tired of seeing your dog's butthole? Is your cat self-conscious about the appearance of her rear? Has your favorite poochy pal let his backside go untouched? Have no fear! Rear Gear is here! Cover up those unsightly, untidy rears and never again will you risk offending others!

And if you call in the next five minutes, we'll throw in a free pet snuggy to cover other unsightly imperfections.

Seriously, does your pet really need pasties* for its butt? Sure, they're cute, and I'm sure some people will get a kick out of them (as of this writing, they're sold out), but really?

Oh, and just in case you don't happen to follow the link over to the Etsy page (I love Etsy, but boy do some people come up with some quirky stuff), you should know that they also come in other designs. Choose from a disco ball, air freshener, heart, flower, biohazard sign, smiley face, number one ribbon, cupcake, sheriff's badge, dice, and anything else you can imagine because there's also the option to customize.

*They actually slide over the tail and don't stick to the dog. Ouch, that would be painful. That's just what they remind me of.